Horosocope can get too coincidental doesn't it?

Last Saturday, I happened to read the horoscope in the Straits Time. To my surprise, it describes best about myself.

"Feeling like if you do not get on the bus, you might miss catching a ride-methaphorically speaking, that is? Well, do not get stressed out. If it meant to happen, it will. If not, it keeps passing you by for a reason."

Well firstly it really descibes a lot about me both methaphorically speaking and vice versa. I have missed the buses a tad too many. Regardless of which shift I am working, be it morning, afternoon and night. I have always missed those buses and my mum would always nag at me and she even changed the time of all the clocks in the house to 20 minutes earlier just so I won't be late. And the methaphorically speaking part, hmmm let's just put it this way, it is kind of how the horoscope describes it but I shall not elaborate more. It is so coincidence but as the saying goes, Life is full of mysteries right?

The recent Sunday, the whole group of us went for another karaoke session but I just do not understand why it felt different from the previous one. I felt something amiss maybe because some usual people could not make it. And I think its probably because I was feeling a bit low that day and one of the reasons was because my 2 close gfs are going away during the same period. One is going to London and the other is going away for camp. And I am so going to miss them, and especially during night shift, I won't have my sleeping kakis. We have become so close to each other that if either one of us is on mc or leave, we could feel the emptiness. But it was fun nonetheless with the same old crazy people making my gloomy day less gloomy. And guess what I went home at ard 4am and I was working morning the following day. Oh well, its not like we meet each other everyday so its a sacrifice which was worth it I must say.

Oh gosh I won't be able to watch my grey's anatomy tomorrow as I am working night shift and there is no way in the world that I can record that show as it from Ntv 7 and can only watch it in my room. Now I have to wait for the re-runs on channel 5. Hate that. Ok ar that's all for now I am going to continue my study for a while now and getting ready to go to work soon. Ciao.

listening to menunggumu by chrisye (btw al-fatihah to him, may allah cucuri rahmat ke atas rohnya. amin, you will be remembered)

How does one know that they have met The One? And to find out there's someone who is better than 'The One'? And why people seek happiness in others?

An issue to ponder. Hmmm...I have always thought about this back then when I was in secondary school and even now. It is a heavy issue I must day but hey when one have too much time on her hands, they think to ponder a lot ayte. These past few days I can't help but think why do people have infidelity or flings or whatever you call it these days. I have seen for myself people having affairs. At first I thought seriously you got to be joking, why do people have affairs when they are already married with whom they thought was The One? So does that boils down to the fact that The One is actually not the one because apparently you met someone better that The One. Call me naive or whatnots but I still think this issue is never going to be resolved.

Why?

Because you will, of course for the love of god will, meet someone better than you previous one, better than your current one and the list goes on. So tell me again how do you tell which is the one that is going to spend the rest of your life with, grow old with you and to really understand you well enough your strengths, weaknesses and not thinking of divorcing you after like what 40 yrs of marriage. So I assumed that's the reason why people do have affairs but hey I maybe wrong, its just one person opinion.

I thought he was the one but I was foolish and too naive I guess. It must be the age, too young mah, where got think of all these rite. But I thought wrong. Now, after years down the road, he figured "Oh god I think I made the wrong decision and if only I could turn back the time, I won't do what I did." Basically his life is messed up, twisted, scary and damaged. So what did I replied, "Too bad, its your loss not mine. I happy-contented but not happy-ecstatic with my life but yah not as twisted, scary and damaged as yours." I really hoped he change for the better but then again that's what he said last year and all the years before. Sukahati kau lah nak, kau dah besar. Dah berbuih mulut aku nasihat, masuk telinga kiri keluar telinga kanan. Asalkan kau jangan babitkan aku sudah cukup. That's all I'm ever asking.

On a lighter note, I managed to catch Mukhsin after so much pestering my friends but I ended up watching it with my sis. I so like the film, very the sepet-like, sweet, nice, romantic, innocent puppy-love and bittersweet. I think I'm Yasmin Ahmad no. 1 fan man. Contrary to popular beliefs about love and romantic films, this film is nothing like that. I would give 8/10 yah I know its bias but hey I love her films, need I say more. Gubra was definitely darker with a tinge of the issue I have been talking about, infidelity. The whole trilogy has deep meanings in life and one has to read between the lines to analyse the film. It is interesting to know and put yourself in her shoes and thinks what she thinks. People collect Star Wars and Lord of the Rings trilogy, I collect Sepet trilogy. Wacthing her films made you realise and see things differently and knowing that things happen for a reason and its always a blessings in disguise and that love is pure and it should stay that way. Btw I cried in this film, Sepet and Gubra like in all the other films like Children of Heaven, Colour of Paradise and Baran. Nice films to watch. It just touches the heart or let's put it this way, my heart. I think I was too touched I must say watching the film that I fell sick the next day. Damn. So very the cannot wait for the dvd, yay the complete trilogy.

http://sg.movies.yahoo.com/Mukhsin/movie/14079/
http://www.focusfilms.cc/film/mukhsin.htm

listening to kenangan terindah by samsons

Things people do when they are bored. What do they do? They do self-reflection.

A few days ago, a friend had a cukur rambut for her dear son. So me and another friend went to the cukur rambut while the rest had other commitments ie. overtime and etc. I was hesistant to go since the rest aren't going but i reckon since im free and she's quite close what the hell. Just go ar i thought to myself thinking that if i were to have the same function i would expect my friends to come rite. Seeing that friend whom i have known since sec 1 really opened my eyes to a different perspective. I didn't really think that all of us have grown up. I still feel as though we are still in sec 1, still playing around and having those what they called cinta monyet. Those were the days, the best days of my life not that my life sucks now but it was so much better back then. Life back then was simpler, study, get good grades and the occassional go-to-town-on-saturdays like any teenagers would do. There wasn't a time when one have to really think about the future, financial state and whatnots.

Looking at my friend, i realised that being a parent is so very the overwhelming and that there is so much responsibility in becoming a parent. I often asked myself this question, "Will i be a good parent? Am i capable of becoming one? And what if my child disappoint me?" Seeing her playing with her son got me thinking how am i going to raise this small little baby, to nurture, to educate and to teach the moral values and all that. To me honestly, i am not perfect and i don't think i have enough knowledge in just about everything be it from religious aspect mainly religious aspect as having a child i considered as an anugerah and amanah from Tuhan and if the child turns out bad means to say that i failed to carry out the amanah. How can i be a good parent when i myself have so much to learn and change? I hate it when some parents chose to dye their child's hair like what the hell were they thinking man, spoiling their soft hair. This is the kind of parent i swear i dun ever want to be.

Btw all of these thoughts are conceived in the constraints space within the four walls of the counter booth i was at for a period of 2hrs. Hahaha there was no traffic you see so when it is ever so peaceful, i use that time to do some self-reflection, thinking and all other things one could possibly think of. I should have brought a book, a dictionary(like some of the china kids who memorise the dictionary) or perhaps a Yasin...hahaha to kill time. I was singing my hearts out in the counter. So today, i went to borrow a book so that i could start reading after so many years of not reading that i think my english have gone from bad to worst. Should start now before my english gets even worst that i can't even speak a proper sentence. Shit another day of night shift, which have its pros and cons. The pros more pay and the cons sleepy and the sianness of having to sit in the counter for hours alone. I think if i am still alone, i will be reading a book or maybe some more self-reflection in which i can't do it anymore on my way home walking at night due to some reasons. I should go now if not i will be late again as i normally do.
Ciao.

listening to rapuh by anang & kris dayanti

My wish did come true and i wish it didn't.

One fine day, I was listening to the radio and there's this song was playing and suddenly i wish for the unthinkingable. And a few days later, the wish came true. I strongly feel if one wish hard for something, it will eventually come true or so it seems. I got mine. What about you?

I know deep down that this is obviuosly a very wrong thing to do but its hard to say no to be friends and all that this person actually wants is just to say hi. Friends keep telling me to just ignore and yes i understand they meant well. But hey we will see how it goes, let this be the last but then again this is what i have been telling myself over the past years. Tell me how can you forget a person whom have known you almost a lifetime, knows a lot about you, your life, your friends, your ups and downs basically to say known you inside out. Listening to what you went through all these years, i cannot help but say "I TOLD U SO, kan dah menyesal sekarang". Oh well now that you learnt from your mistakes and of course all these experiences taught you a lot.
Im glad that you have grown none the wiser. I am thankful that i didn't have to go through all that because if i were to do that, i can't imagine what i would do kill myself i guess or probably go into deep depression not that i ever was but yah....hahaha. And now to add on my list of problems, you chose to move somewhat near. Oh how wonderful! Of all the places in Singapore, you chose to stay like what it seems to be only 15 mins away from me.

Last but not least, i am happy for you seriously but i think its best that you just lead the life you chose and be happy and grateful for what you have and stop bugging me. Hahahaha. Ciao got to get ready for work.

listening to promiscuous girl by nelly furtado